Stress is making it worse.

I was just told by my OBGYN that I have abnormally low thyroid hormone levels. Oddly enough, this means I most likely have an overactive thyroid, which doesn't sound bad until you look it up on the internet. It's dangerous if left untreated, resulting in complications such as osteoporosis and congestive heart failure. That scares me because I don't know how long this has been going on. Obviously I need to get in to see a primary care doctor but the last time I did that I had to wait 2 months. Granted, it is my fault that I haven't had a primary care doctor set up but like the radio ad I heard yesterday said, most people don't think about needing a doctor until they're sick. The symptom that really got me worried was fatigue, which I've been battling for over a month now (it's gotten worse in the last few weeks). Other symptoms include:

• "Sudden weight loss, even when your appetite and diet remain normal or even increase
• Rapid heartbeat (tachycardia) — commonly more than 100 beats a minute — irregular heartbeat (arrhythmia) or pounding of your heart (palpitations)
• Increased appetite
• Nervousness, anxiety and irritability
• Tremor — usually a fine trembling in your hands and fingers
• Sweating
• Changes in menstrual patterns
• Increased sensitivity to heat
• Changes in bowel patterns, especially more frequent bowel movements
• An enlarged thyroid gland (goiter), which may appear as a swelling at the base of your neck
• Fatigue, muscle weakness
• Difficulty sleeping"

I literally just pulled that off of the Mayo Clinic website page about Hyperthyroidism.. The Wikipedia website lists Grave's Disease as the #1 cause of hyperthyroidism (60-90% of cases). Most people don't know this about me, but I actually have already dealt with an autoimmune disease once. I was 2.5 years old or so and I had Kawasaki Disease. Generally speaking, it's a reaction the body has to some kind of virus and it's so severe that a child could easily die if not treated immediately. I was apparently involved in some kind of experimental treatment program so my parents didn't have to pay for it (thank goodness...my dad had been working at his new job for like 20 days before this happened) and they did a ton of post-illness testing, including years later to make sure there weren't any leftover problems. I tested clean and clear after I healed from it and I have one memory of some people strapping me down to a table and taking blood from my arm (and going to McDonald's later LOL) and apparently that was the very last test. Crazy, right?? 

So, if I do have Grave's Disease, I have confidence that I will get through it. It's not curable, but it is manageable and I am SOOOOO looking forward to feeling like myself again. It's just scary to think about having an incurable disease. 

I'm caught in a nasty cycle because stress makes it worse, and yet because I have it (really it's a "probably have it" situation) I am stressing about it. 

I need a vacation...

(find a happy place find a happy place find a happy place find a happy place...)

There is something completely adorable about baby animals in coffee mugs...

Here, here, here, here, here, and here respectively.

Yeah, that's what I do when I'm stressed. I look at cute baby animals in cups. I'm weird.

Tomorrow is the Superbowl! And I'm having a small party! And more than one person is coming!! YAY! Last time I had a party, one person came, so I've concluded that either I suck at putting fun parties together or people just don't like me very much. *le sigh*

OR I really don't know enough people. Yeah, I like that one best. :)

Trygve and I have been talking about maybe breeding Lucy in the future...I think I would like this:

I agree with these people, though. I think it would be best to have a yard first. :)

Alright, I need to take down the Christmas ornaments before our party tomorrow...peace!

~Steph